Sad Goodbyes/New Beginnings

Well hello there to all my faithful readers. I hope this week is being good to you so far. So as someone who doesn't really hold a lot in, I've been doing just that for awhile now. For the most part there is still some stuff up in the air so I don't want to go into those details, So the question now is, what exactly will I be telling you in this edition.
Simple, I said goodbye yesterday to two years of employment. Two years ago I was searching for something new. I was looking for away to escape becoming more withdrawn. I found that in the land of cubes, I found my escape and I found that I wanted was to be with people once again. I found some really great people and made friends. Roo even made some of those friends with me. A lot has changed in the last two years for us. The land of cubes was a new beginning for me, It allowed me to get away from my grief of loss and strangely enough helped me to move on. I was able to put feeling into my work and move on. Work has always been cheaper than therapy.
They were there when once again a year ago I lost another member of my family, again allowing me to put those emotions in work. Now it's time to close that chapter of my life. I hope to not have to lose those friends that I made but it's time to begin making my way back to the world.
I was able to accomplish so much and my family remains proud of me, but now its time to go back out and mingle face to face.
I don't know if I'm going to like it, I don't know if I'm still going to be good at it. But I do know that this is something that is right for me to do, right now. I'll keep you posted on everything of course and let you know about the other happenings in my life. So today's post is short but I did want to give you some insight into what is going on with me,
Later Days

Cheer Grand Chamipions

Happy Saturday to all my faithful readers. It's me again, and I am here to give some updates on life in the wonderful world of me. 1st things first. Mini's Cheer team was awesome last Saturday. I want to start by telling you this was supposed to be a cool day for their competition. The girls went down to my home town, Mabank, Friday night, spent the night in the hotel (where I'm told they were greatness for the moms) They got their hair did then it was off to bed. Saturday morning these girls got up, ate breakfast, ran a small muck and began to get ready for one long chilly day. They wore their long sleeves, that were purchased for the cool weather. They all looked the same, we got them to the field and learned a very sorry truth. That cool weather we were supposed to be experiencing was put to the back due to the sun and our girls were the second division to perform and we were only on the first (Midgets). As I handed off Mini and the other girls to our Team mom I felt a little pride watching my girl walk away. Though it had been a few years since we experienced the first competition jitters, I still felt that not only has time been slipping away, but that my little Mini was growing up. I directed some of the other parents on where our girls would need to be, then of course felt horrible as I had to be the one to say "We can't go with them," Competition rule 1) Once Cheerleader is on the property she needs to say goodbye to mom and dad and be placed in the hands of the coaches.
We watched from the home side bleachers of Eustace, great field-bad seating, as our girls began to finish getting ready. We waited as the sun began to feel like it was melting us, waiting for the first girl to to complain. I even talked to mini but she remained in good spirits. As the Midgets were finally led off the field it was time for our girls to begin. It was then that we realized we may have a long wait.
While watching the other districts perform I can tell you as a parent, I would silently cheer at the deductions that I knew were happening. Though I knew I would feel bad for the other teams as they dropped a person or as they were just two seconds off on their routine, I was secretly glad for the point bump for our girls. While we were waiting for our girls to perform I ran into an old friend of mine from school. It has been 13 years since we last saw each other and though we were cheering for different teams now we were still able to catch up a little bit.
I have to brag on our girls again, not only did we all witness as they sat there waiting for their turn in the heat. As we watched the other teams and their antics, ours were perfect. (Not just bragging) It was finally time for our girls to perform. I had tears. They were so awesome, I hadn't gotten to see the whole competition performance since I had been working, but these girls did fantastic. They were all together, they were all on point. They were awesome. As we waited for the awards we noticed once again that our girls were still being well behaved. They made us all proud at this time. Just by the way they handled themselves. We have 9 teams that performed. 5 Teams would receive participation awards. (Yes everyone does get a trophy) When our girls were not announced among those teams us mom began to get the good vibes. We knew our girls had placed. When they girls didn't get 4th or 3rd we began to hold hands and get shaky. This left only two spots.
When they called second place our whole section of the crowd went crazy....We screamed, we hollered, we made fools of ourselves. We couldn't be prouder and then we laughed because our girls were looking at us like we all lost our minds. But then they made the announcement that we, as parents realized only moments before....

                                                              Our Girls Won Grand Champions!!!!!
That's right, we knew the moment the other team was named as 2nd place that our girls had just won 1st place. And as a parent seeing the excitement was more of a high than anything. We knew then that for at least awhile these girls were going to be very hard to deal with. (lol) These little girls showed us all not only how well they could behave, they showed us how they could should them all just what they could do. They were one of the largest groups but they proved they were the best.
With all this being said, these girls not only won that day but then went to the game that night, were their boys played and beat the team of the 2nd place. We proud of all of the teams but we were most proud of the energy our girls had. Now this week we get a week off since its rainy, But next weekend we are looking at another full weekend. I have to say I'm happy she enjoys it and I am looking forward to more cheer years.
Later Days

Mini the Cheerleader and Catch up

Happy Middle of the week folks. Its me again. I know, I know, who else would it be on my blog? But you never know one day I may let Mini give you her opinion of how life should be going. But for tonight I'm gonna catch you up. First up, I'll start with this adorable picture to the left.
For those of you who know us, you are aware that Mini decided to be a cheerleader again. I'm not gonna lie, after the first go round I had some reservation about it but Roo and I are totally on board. We actually like this set of parents and they have made it fun for our sweet little girl. This past weekend was her homecoming weekend and unlike the first go round she got to escort a young football player on the field. I have to say though I love all photos of my sweet little Mini this is one of my favorites from that day. Though the first few photos I have you can tell she was a little nervous. It was greatness. But what was even better then her beautiful smile was that the boys won their home game. I know I always like to tell you how proud I am of her but she really has blossomed this year. Above you can see just how much she has grown. For most of those that have been following this blog and other blogs that I have had the pleasure of writing you literally been apart of her growing up. It's hard to believe just how much time has flown by with. So this weekend we will be finding ourselves back home. Well more to Roo's home. Our cheer competition this year is back at Roo's old high school. Thankfully once you graduate from the country you always remember how to get back there.
Now when I tell you that we have had fun with the parents, I really want to tell you about this group. These Cheer....Dads, yup that's what I said CheerDads, these dads are pretty awesome. 1st we are talking about a group of dads that if you saw them you may not believe me, but these guys are more then willing to get out there and make fools of themselves just to make these girls smile. Heck even during the games they entertain us Mamma's. It warms my heart that they aren't afraid to poke fun at themselves (and anyone else with in earshot) It's hard to meet people that you have stuff in common with and this group is kind of like one big family. Roo and one of the C-D's is above being goofs. Thankfully they have an awesome sense of humor and didn't get to upset of us poking fun of them. But once again I point out these guys are pretty awesome. I'll have some more stories about them I'm sure.

Since it's been awhile since I've written, well I don't actually know how long it's been but I'll catch you up pretty quickly. In the land of cubes, I have been feeling a little unappreciated. Yes I am aware that is apart of the business world but at times I still feel like I am being punished for things that were beyond my control. Though for the most part I try and succeed to ignore people. There are those that have taken some positions a little to their heads and don't realize that just because you have it doesn't mean you should flaunt it. I mean it can be lost as easy and quickly as it was given  But what can you do? Yes, I am always looking for new opportunities, though right now everything is just rolling slow it seems.

Here at the little castle, Roo and I are still making some decision about the future. Things we want to work and things we know we have to accept. Basically it's pretty much the same, sometimes the hardest choices are actually the easiest. But that's for another blog. I did get to see my nephew last weekend. I wish I could see him more but like everything else life throws I was just happy to have him for the little bit I got to hold him. Mini worries that he won't like her, even though she repeats what I used to and still tell her "everyone that knows you, loves you. And those that don't, just don't know you yet" My Mini has a heart of gold she tends to worry often.

The Bestie update. It sucks when the kids are busy cause then it's hard to get together. One of the pair no longer works in magical land of cubes with us so it's sad. But other than that my other little nephew is just as adorable as ever. We got to seem him and he smiled and danced for me when I was holding him. I was so excited to get to pick him up again. Then with hour changing it's a little difficult to spend time with the bestie but you know it doesn't matter just knowing she's there helps.

Well that is pretty much it for now. We've got the fair on Monday and the Mini is taking a friend this year so I should have some fun stories for that. Good night Peeps and Later days.

An Oil Change and Some Entertainment/Saturday Night Lights

Good Sunday Morning to all my faithful readers. For those of you on my Facebook I promised I would tell you about my fun trip to the dealership yesterday. But first a little back story. In 2012 I returned to work, my congratulations present was my 2013 Kia Rio. They didn't have blue so I went with white as seen. ------------------------------------------------------->

First let me say I love my car, gets good gas mileage. Since my surgery I haven't really driven it much and because of that I have to get it inspected. (Yes I know a little late?) My grandmother purchased a car from them on our recommendation so we got a service credit. The service credit is going to be mentioned several times so you may want to keep it in mind, lol. 

Roo said lets get the oil changed and inspected before you go back. So that was the plan. Kia was running a special on an oil change, show on the website, you can also make an appointment on the site to get said oil change or whatever service you may need done. This information will also come in handy in just a moment. So Friday night I made the appointment for Saturday at 8:30 am. Yesterday was Mini's first football game of the season so we wanted to get everything done so we could have some time to relax. 

Back to the Oil Change. We get to the dealership, walk in and our service rep comes over. Now the information is in Roo's name but the guy addresses me. (I didn't really want to go) I tell him we have an appointment for 8:30 he begins to talk pricing $99, I tell him that I am aware they are running a special as well as having the $100 service credit. We hand the keys over and go take a seat.

Mini likes to go because she can play on the computer so while she is playing Roo and I sat down while she played and began the wait on our car. Ken comes out and the following is the first aggravation of the day.

Ken: Mr and Mrs Vent could you please come with me?

we walk outside wondering what is going on.

Roo: Whats wrong?

Ken: Your tires are worn. (he points to the tires) see this? It's rubbing against inside and it's like this on all tires.

Roo: Ok so we will need to replace them?

Ken: Yes sir we really need to get this done. 

Me: It's not going to happen today (I don't think I was heard at this point)

Roo: What will that run.

Ken: (kind of puts on that whole salesman routine of straightening up and adjusting his belt...he's about to piss me off) Well for a full set of tires it's gonna be 395, then to align and balance thats gonna be 89 then

Roo: So it's gonna be about $500?

Ken: Yes sir but it needs to be done, so I can get it

Me: No, it's not going to happen today, we don't have $500, what we have is a $100 service credit just do the oil change and rotate tires and we will get the rest this next week.

Ken: Well ma'am your inspection is out and with out tires you will not be able to get it inspected.

Me: I'm aware, I'll get this week. 

Ken: Oh about that credit, we can't locate it. You will have to speak with a Sales Manager, I mean I'll write it up but there's not much we can do.

Roo and I go back inside and go to see about talking to the Sales manager. Now remember our appointment was at 8:30 am it's now about 8:45 so when I go and ask for the sales manager to help us we are told that they don't even come in until 9 am. (seeing a little red now)

Roo and I sit down for a bit waiting for sales manager to come in. As we wait Mini asks for some help on one of the computer games and then comes back. Once he is back beside me old Ken comes back. He sets to filters besides us and as we look at him the following is the conversation.

Ken: This is your air filters, this one (he points to a smaller one) is the in-dash it's going to be $39, this one (points to a bigger one) is the engine it's $59. They need to be changed.

Roo: Is one more important?

Ken: The engine filter really needs to be replaced. We haven't been able to see the credit

Me: Ok let me try this again, because apparently you didn't hear me. You have a $100 service credit, that's it.

Ken: I can not locate it, typically they send you a cardboard like coupon. And this is just $39 and $59.

Me: I understand so I'll say it this way. Please stay with. (I'm a little upset by this point) I have been out of work, He (pointing to Roo) is carrying the weight, We (gesturing between Roo and I) have a $100 service credit that you can't seem to find, You tell us that we have to pay $500 for tires and when I say it can't happen you  then want me to pay $39 and $59 on two air filters, oh and because you can't find a credit I have to go talk to a Sales Manager and yet you neglected to tell us that they don't even come in til 9 and well we have some time. All I want is what we came in for which is the oil change, tire rotation, air filter ect. everything that is running on the special. Again you have $100 make it work.

Ken: I'm sorry ma'am I wont bother you again.

He picks up the filters and stomps back to the back. I am upset by this point because though it needs to happen I feel like this man is trying to push up on us for more money. I wasn't lying I didn't have it to give. When I talk to the sales manager low and behold they were able to locate the credit. They apologize for our hassle and go to speak with the gentle man. A little bit later Ken comes back to tell us that we are good to go but that he still recommends the tires tells me I need to sign this paper stating that I am taking my car against recommendation.  Though I know I shouldn't have I signed it. I did find tires cheaper but didn't say anything. When we left I was looking over everything and then discovered that they didn't even rotate the tires or put in the filter, you have the credit, you tell me this is what we need and yet you refuse use it to fix the issue. Anyway this was my fun trip to Southwest Kia Rockwall. Though I love the sales staff, this man left little to be desired. 

Now as for our Saturday Night Lights. It was hot as hell people, but we waited like good parents and  got to see some cute performances. Our boys won their first game against the Quinlan Panthers and of course our Mini was the beautiful little cheerleader. I was so proud of her. Well happy Sunday....

The power of Change

Well hello there to all my faithful readers, I hope that as we approach a new school year I wanted to talk to you for a moment about something that scares the living hell out of all us. Change.

It's funny in away that out of all the words in the English language this is the one that has the ability to make us feel anxiety, joy, fear, sadness and so forth and yet we don't refer to it as the ugly six letter word like we do most cuss words. We use the word to continually help us get our thoughts and points across. The last few years for my family have seen many changes. We have learned to adapt to our environment even though all we wanted to do was crumble to the floor and weep. 

As society has taught us Change is all about adapting, of course social media allows us and outlet to express our thoughts and opinions on how this six letter word makes us feel. For many of us that work with in the magical land of cubes, we express our frustrations over how one group of people can drastically change the way we do business. And how that change affects each and everyone of us. For the most part we are aware that we must adapt but at the same time we have that small resistance that the change they believe is for the better may actually hinder our work process. 

For parents this six letter word is significant, every year, every month, every week, every day our children are changing. They are growing, they are adapting to their surroundings. I am so proud of Mini, she is one of my greatest treasures and yet the fact that she is getting older terrifies me. She is so smart and she has such a loving and trusting heart that I know that the first time she truly faces heartbreak it will also crush me as well. No I do not look forward to that day. This year will be her last in elementary school, yes she will be there for a while but this will be the last time she will walk through those doors for the first day of school. She has grown up so much over the years. She has faced many challenges and changes with a smile and again I couldn't be prouder. Our children are our future, well that and technology. 

Change happens all around us every day.

In the small towns I live in, I see it everyday and I wonder if it's really for the better. We will be getting some bigger businesses which will of course generate more revenue and more jobs for our community it can also make those that live here feel like the once small town is growing to become a bigger town and is that really what we want? I do of course only because growth can be a positive thing though right now it's the thought of the unknown that puts fear into people and I think right there is what Change means to many. 

Sometimes we take to much on ourselves and we don't know how to get out from under the mountain of obligations. Sometimes we are so focused on making things better for ourselves and our children that we lose focus of whats important. Then we tell ourselves that we are going to make Changes and that we will change how we look at things. Hmmm not really sure that this will happen but it's nice to be delusional every once and while. 

Loved ones make changes in their lives to live better, they make a choice to quit or to begin something so that they can become better. Well good luck to them, I mean this. Every day I try to make a small change in my life. I recognize that it will be scary and that it will be tough but at the same time Momma and Daddy always said if your not happy with how things are going then change it. 

This six letter word that has the power to literally bring us to our knees also has the power to bring us happiness, we give words all sorts of powers we place emphasis on words that can show us our weaknesses or can provide us strength. So as you read this and then think about it just remember yes it can be scary but it can also be the best thing in life. But don't let anyone talk you out of making that change you may want to make in your life. 

Be the Change that makes the world a better place. 

Later days peeps

 

Surgery & Recovery

Happy Tuesday all my faithful readers. I write to you today in bed (I know that's not really new) but today's bed rest is brought to you by the good Doc's orders from recovery. Last Thursday, Roo and I got up early to go up to the Hospital. My surgery day had finally arrived. There was a small part of me that wanted to change my mind, scared that my husband would look at me differently or that I would feel less that what I am. But after a few deep breathes I realized that this was something I needed. True I had come to this decision several days before, a few weeks before that and again a few months before that, but that will happen to a person before they go through the surgery.
The good doctor told Roo that I was a text book procedure. Me? Well that didn't really tell me anything or if they did I wouldn't remember. We got to the hospital bright and early, got checked in then it was off to get uncomfortable. The sweet nurse told me to take it all off and get in the gown. (I hate those gowns) Of course any time I have to have something done or even be in one of those stupid gown I have to go to the rest room, it never fails. So there I go holding the back closed so no one can see my backside. I come back to get comfy and the nurse comes in to say "I'll need you to sign a waiver, since you already went to the restroom" I didn't know that was something you weren't supposed to do She then decided that it was time to explain that it was ordered for me to take a pregnancy test needless to say I signed the waiver. Have you ever had an I.V of Saline?
Well first off it makes you whole arm cold. Then it always makes me, have to go to the restroom, I know again. While the sweet nurse was helping me, I could not hold my I.V. and the back of my outfit fully closed, I offered to take her pregnancy test, you know in case they really needed it. She laughed. I'm glad she laughed. Roo stayed with me until they said it was time to go and then I was out. I'm a great patient like that. I don't fight the medicine I just let it go through me. Then of course it was time to wake up.
The man yelled at me....Well ok I'm sure he didn't yell but to my befuddled brain it sure did sound that way. The male nurse in recovery asked what he could get me. "I just want my Roo." he looked around and asked if thats a stuffed animal. "No husband." and I closed my eyes again. When I came to next it was to see my Roo and my Mini. I was so happy she asked how I felt I think I told her I wasn't sure but I know I asked where Papa was. Roo went back to get my dad and the nurse fed me some ice chips.
Going to the room was a fun experience as the transporter managed to hit every bump, but he was so nice I really didn't care.
I've grown up around Baylor Hospital. I am very proud of the fact that my family has worked there for most of my life at one time or another and this visit was no different. They took excellent care of me. The nurses were sweet and very helpful. Mini even got to come and visit me on Friday they said I was doing really well. I got up to walk and even begged for a shower. Gigi stayed with me Friday night, and the staff loved her so much they made sure that she had her own food Saturday morning.
Coming home was something I did with a little fear as I have dogs and I was worried that they would try to jump on me but even they seem to have known and have been real easy.
The fear that my love would look at me differently or feel that I was no longer whole is something that is in the back of my mind but the reality that he wants me to be out of pain and wants what is best for me is right here. The surgery was saying goodbye to a part of me and the recovery is making me better. It's not an easy road and so far the recovery has been almost perfect but I am willing to do what I need to get better.
So I will keep you posted as I continue to rest and recoup.
Later days

Birthdays and Surgery

So quite a bit has happened since I last posted. We kicked off June by celebrating my dad's birthday. It was a good day. Not a lot went on that way just playing it low key but it was nice to spend the time together. We then of course celebrated once again for fathers day. Another low key day for both dad and Roo, it was a day of rest for a bigger part of it. I think the guys enjoyed their day, Mini was at the in-laws so it was just
Roo and I. Next it was my turn to celebrated a birthday. We kicked it off with breakfast with the parents then it was time to party with the Bestie, who just happened to be celebrating too. It was a good night and fun was of course had by all. Even if I was a little drunk (which I don't do very often.) After the birthday fun we went to the lake for the 4th of July. The girls had a great time camping with Papa and Gigi, they got to swim and then make smore's Mini was so happy to have a friend with her. And though I missed Roo not making it, we all made the best of it and another good time was had by all. The main thing was to just spend some time away for a few days.

The excitement hasn't stopped there though. Mini started Cheer again. I know, I know after the last time I swore it would never happened again but she had friends doing it and then she begged so we broke down. So far she has had a packed summer and I haven't really seen to much of her lol, which I guess happens as they get older. The fun hasn't stopped, last week she got to spend sometime with Nanny and her cousins. She's a pretty blessed kid, she loves her family and always likes when they get to come down for a visit. This past week was no different. The girls had a blast going to the splash park. Mini doesn't really need a pool she says just as long as she has water. I would love to have that outlook again. Everything was so simple. 

Then it was time for another great birthday... My nephew was born. Mini is happy that she has another little one in her life. Eventually I'll share his picture and introduce you all to this handsome little man but like most things in life I want to keep him private for a little while longer. But needless to say he is fantastic and Boo and S-I-L are over the moon for him as are the rest of the family.

So now it brings me to today's big news. I will be having a partial hysterectomy. This was actually decided back in May but I have been trying to get everything in order and get the excitement of birthdays and holidays behind me. I have suffered with pains for years and it has only progressed and gotten worse. After talking to Roo both of us decided that this was a good next step. So it was time to speak with the doctor. At first I figured he would be resistant due to my age. Thankfully he was on my side and agreed that this would be the best path for me. So after some shifting and moving around we settled on a date and viola I will be having surgery.

Well that is pretty much what has been going on so far. I'll of course keep you posted

Later Days

Mini Update/Memorial Day It's Bigger then this

Well hello to all my faithful readers. I hope that this month is treating you well. First off I want to tell you that this school year is almost over. Soon my sweet Mini will be in the 4th grade. I cringe when I say this because she is just getting to big. I am so proud of the young lady that she is becoming. This has been another big year for her.She has found some really good friends, she has made new friends. And once again she has shown what a big heart she has. Her field trip included Ball Park in Arlington. She is now obsessed
with the idea of going to a Rangers Game. So we are looking forward to that. Well ok then now on to the next part of the blog today.

Happy Memorial Day!!!!

Isn't odd that we say Happy Memorial Day, when this day is really anything but happy. This day is to remind us about those that gave their lives so that we can remain in the land of the free. We celebrate this day every year on the last Monday of May. Many people realize and understand the importance of the day while others see it as a day to get off work. This day was originally called Decoration Day. The importance of the day was to commemorate,  not celebrate, both the Union and Confederate soldiers who died in battle.  Though it seems a little selfish to only remember those soldiers who died during that time, by the 20th Century others agreed and made the day to extend to all Americans who died as they served in our military. 

Many will go and visit the graves of those soldiers many will visit those graves of those they hold dear and they will question their sacrifice, but then again there will be some that will not understand the significance of all that has taken place to keep Americans safe. There are people out there that want to protest and that want to say what horrible way people are treating our soldiers. They don't see behind the curtain. They don't see the fact that our soldiers are volunteering to protect us. They are literally stating that they will defend our lives with their own, should they need to. They do not go into it for the money, they do not go into it for the glory as many that have and will continue to fight will never been mentioned in the a history book. They will be hero's to their families. They will be hero's to their hometowns, but for the rest of the world they will sadly go unknown. 

Do our brave men and women get treated awesomely? No, they do not. They get the shaft in pay and respect. They are one of the first to get the pay cut and the ones to go unthanked for their service and yet they still do it. They still wake up on the daily and put on the suite for their daily round of lets protect the innocent, the weak, and sadly the even the ignorant. We put a lot of faith in those who have protected us with their lives and yet at the same time we don't stand behind them. 

Some people state that they are standing up for our soldiers. They are only protesting the war due to the treatment but has anyone of them chose to stand behind them. They are our front line and we need to be their back line. We need to support them and to show them that we have their backs. We do not have to agree why they are fighting but we need to be grateful for the fact that they have selflessly chose to defend our country. 

So to me this day is not actually happy it is a day to remember why we are here. It serves as a reminder of the freedoms that we fought to keep and that we won the rights too. It serves as a day to say thank you to those that lost their lives to keep us safe. For our ancestors who chose to stand up and fight, they may have fought for the wrong side, the wrong reason, the wrong everything, but they died for a cause. They died for something they believed in and today is so much bigger then what people actually understand. It's a day to remember its a day to take that one breath of relief that someone chose to fight for us. That they continue to fight. So once again today is to say thank you. 

Thank you for those that came before. Thank you to those that have come during and thank you to those that will come after. Though I do not wish death on anyone I am very thankful for those that have done something that I myself can not. They gave their lives, whether it was willingly or not they still have had hand in keeping myself and my family safe and for that I am grateful.   

Later Days

Another Mothers Day Coming Up

Hey there to all my faithful readers. Look to the baby on the right, So small, so innocent so full of something. Looking at this little bundle of pink and girl you would never know that she would grow up to be at times indecisive, but strong willed. This little bundle would grow to become someone who believes in magic but also knows that reality sometimes has a way of sneaking up on you. She will grow up to believe that her parents are superhero's and that her mom will become her best friend.  

She will face hardships and make choices and decisions that she will later question but will remain strong and believe that they were the right decisions. She will be fair with in her education and grow up to realize the fact that she is not defined but what she was able to learn. This little bundle of goodness will grow to learn that love is one of the greatest treasures that one can find. She will watch with awe as her parents show that even with the messiness it is worth it. She's going to grow up realizing that all the struggles and issues she will face as a kid and awkward teenage were just trials and perpetration for the future. This girl is going to grow up to smile through the pain and to learn to laugh at the ridiculousness of the world.  She's going to learn who she is and she's going to learn that she can become anyone she wants to be. She's going to find that special person and realize that all the boys she based her opinions on were just showing her that she was made for something more. She is going to test the patience of those around her but show she is so worth the battle. This little girl is going to love with everything she has and then she's going to fall in love right at the moment she thinks it's never going to happen. But before you think that she grows up to fall in love with a man who shows her kindness and makes her smile I should also clarify. Though she will find the man of her dreams she's actually going to fall in love at least two more times in her life. The first time she will become the mother of a pernicious little one who will have her daddy wrapped around her finger. She will struggle to make sure that she can live up to the example that was her own mother. She will worry and make wild plans for the future. She will stand firm and refuse to back down when questioned. She will keep her safe and make sure that she knows she is loved by all. She will hope that her little one sees her as the super hero she saw her own mother. The next time she will fall in love she will also experience a heart break. Most people will experience this with that first love. I'm pretty sure she would have too but she will know the true meaning of a broken heart. But with the love and hand holding she will become stronger. Knowing that she will not be given any trial that she can not handle she will face it with a humor and belief that everything happens for a reason. 

But by just looking at the picture, just looking at the newborn baby you wouldn't know how her life is going to go. You don't know that as a mom you're going to get see and help shape this young person. Your going to be able to see the trials and struggles that they believe are so earth shattering that all you can do is take a deep breath and wait for the world to stop. As a mom you're going to be loved and disliked as your young one grows. Your going to want to and ask those most important question "Why can't I just start over" but at the same time feel blessed that they are apart of this life. You will cry with her and you will fight with her. And she this little bundle grows to be a woman she will thank you every year for not holding that pillow a little tighter. She will know that everything you have done is only to help her to become better. 

Since I am the little bundle of fluff in the above picture I can tell you that though I questions myself most days as a mom I am extremely thankful for the opportunity to be a mom. I could not imagine my life with the out the little bundle of light below. She is my mini and though we could not keep her sister I am still the proud mother of two beautiful little girls. As Mothers day is coming up I can tell you that I am thankful that my mother is my best friend. She has taught me how to be a mom. So for the little bundle of bliss below I hope that she will grow to be everything that I have become.  

I do not wish for her to face some of the same things that I have but if she should I hope that she will be able to make the right choices. I hope that she gets to experience the love that I have found and I hope she continues keep the smile that brightens up the room. She is my life. So happy Mothers Day to all the mothers out there. Don't be in a rush to have your little ones grow up. And for those that are judging their children or making those plans based on a picture, don't be so quick to try and figure it out. Let them live and just show them that you love them, I may not be a brain surgeon but my parents are proud of me just the way I am.

A Mothers Worry/Mini's Day

I love this picture I took today. Mini is so cute even when I know she is in pain. "A picture is worth a thousand words" they say. And looking at this picture I know that it is true. To many it just looks like she's not real happy and may it shows that her mouth is slightly swollen. To me and her dad it tells a slightly different story. Mini had to go to the dentist a while back. We learned on that visit that one of the caps that they placed in when she was really little was just loose enough that it was not allowing her to get to it when she brushed. Due to this and the fact that it was literately hanging on by a gum (half of it was disconnected from the gum) the dentist suggested that it be removed. "No problem" we said and Roo set up the date. Unfortunately we then learned that on the day she was set to have this tooth removed she was also supposed to have STAAR testing at school. Now I have many feelings toward this test, none of them very good, but I am still dutifully standing behind our teachers, anyway I digress. We had to change the appointment, we thought we would have a little time and all would be well as they were giving her antibiotics for the small infection. Then last Friday night there was some worry. Her tongue was swollen, she couldn't swollen and she was scared. So the second picture that tells another story is the one here where she was at the E.R. she wasn't sure what was going on and then again neither were we. Now as a mother I can tell you that I often skip some worries, mainly because I know that our children will have the regular bumps and bruises as they play. I know that they will become sick from time to time. But when it comes to her being really sick, like not being able to swallow, well I tend to become a little more worried over that kind of thing. So after speaking with her Gigi, and letting her try to take some medicine for a bit to see if it would go down we found ourselves at the new E.R.. Of course Roo and I spent a few minutes trying to decide what nationality her doctor was. Not for any other reason then he had a really cool accent. I still say Russian. Again neither here or there.
It turned out that night that the small infection from her tooth ended up being a little bigger deal then what we originally thought and it was causing her lymph-nodes to swell. So it was on with the stronger meds and with the fact that it was no longer a small issue it was time that this tooth actually come out. So first thing Monday I made the call to reschedule and make this happen. So today was the day. We waited a few days so she could take that stupid test again but this morning it was off to the dentist to have the offending tooth pulled. So like I said the picture above tells me a pretty big story. It tells me how sick she was and how brave she was. They gave her the cotton candy gas so that they could pull it. The downside was that they asked for us to wait outside so that they could pull the tooth. She said she didn't feel a thing and then a little later on she began feel it. Bless her, she was so ready to have it over with that she was just ready. I don't know how she remained so calm but I was so proud of her.
As a her mother I do tend to over worry but during the procedure she was great, afterward she was good a little groggy but she was aware of everything around her and they said that was a good sign. We had to run a few errands and by the time we got home she was tired and ready to take some medicine. She then decided that it was time for a nap and she slept for quite a bit. So again that picture tells me so much. It tells me that though she went through all of this she was still happy. It tells me that she is strong and brave, all things that we knew, but most of all it tells me that my daughter is beautiful even in pain. It tells us of everything we have been through with her this past week and reminds me that even when she's in pain she keeps her sense of humor. Both of these pictures also remind me that I am her mother and that as her mother my worry does not stop just because she suddenly feels fine. It does not end when I think she is finally asleep peacefully. It continues and will continue as she grows. See my Mini is not sick very often but when she is the world will and does crumble around her. She is like her sister, she touches everyone in a different way. Her heart is as good as gold, This little girl is very much loved and though I will continue to share her fun stories and wonder at times why I have not hurt her just yet I can tell you that this little one owns my heart.
So have fun my friends and thank you once again for being with us.

Birthday's and Fun Parties

Once upon a time you could have a birthday party with you friends and have cake and ice cream and call it a day. Of course as I've gotten older I realize that my parents quite possibly went through the same routine as I have. In fact I think that they may have went through the same tortuous waiting and planning, worrying that their sweet little girl wouldn't have a happy birthday. This is something that I believe that all parents go through. When I was a kid I didn't realize how everything behind the scenes worked.   See me ----------------------------------->
Aren't I cute? First I must point out, yes Mini looks like me except that I have darker hair. The smile is still the same. I also must point out that that is a Strawberry Shortcake cake sadly she is older then what must people believe. Again not the point. That was what I would have believed one of the best parties. We had a pool in the backyard it was summer it was great. Now as an adult I have realized that my child-like definition of simple may be way off. Being a parent can be tough. Being a parent on a budget...Well I have even more respect for mine. I always say that pulling off a great party is like performing Magic. We worry until the day of and then we are able to take a deep breath of relief when we realize that once again we are their hero's or shero's of our childs eyes and then we move onto the "how do we top this"
Bella's 1st birthday was at home. She overstuffed on cake but had a good time. Her 2nd birthday we celebrated at an indoor bounce house it was also Easter so she was an Easter baby and she had so much fun.When she turned 3 I think she was pretty low key cause strangely none of us can actually remember what we did lol. Her 4th birthday was spent once again home were we rented a bounce house and she again had fun. on these parties were not that expensive I think that the most I had spent by this time was about $200 all total on a party for fun.
Her 5th birthday was Chuck E Cheese my amazing surprise that it was a little more expensive this year. Couldn't believe that people would charge you for the happiness of your children. She did have fun which is always a good thing. When she turned 6 I had threaten Roo that he had to be home for her birthday since he was working California at the time. Again saved some money and enjoyed her party at home. When she turned 7, her sister had just passed and we really wanted to keep it low key. I didn't think I could handle all the strain and pressure on the party thing so thankfully my beautiful little Mini chose to spend it at Medieval Times, we had a great time. It was nice just having the family around. I was great full that she decided that we could keep it just us, I mean could you image the price tag on that one? Last year she turned 8 and I wanted to make up for the previous year so we once gain let her pick her venture. Once again the money spent was actually not that bad. Mini wanted to bowling and play games. What was the perfect place? Shenaniganz, she had an awesome time and we were once again the coolest parents ever. But once again I ran into a small problem. Now I would have to top this some way some how. I always ask Mini to decide what she wanted to do and she did not disappoint. She wanted to have a Spa Party....
Now many parents wonder why I would be willing to let my child to choose her theme. Well because it is her birthday and she gets to choose. Then of course I am struck with a small issue she not only wants a spa party but she wants these girls to spend the night. Now what to do....I won't use my own home (not getting into that) I don't want to use my parent's home cause that's gonna be a lot of mess...hmmm what to do. Then it hit me, I told Mini that I would agree to her party but there would be stipulations. I would agree to this slumber party and will hold said slumber party at the local hotel but she would have to scale down her list. Mini was agreeable and we began to plan. For this party I would need a plan Needed a cool cake, needed some cool goodies and then needed something other stuff to do. The cake was done by Kimberly and Loren's Sweet Treats https://www.facebook.com/LorensSweetTreats These ladies did a wonderful job and the birthday girl was so happy. The case was vanilla (I know you may think it's boring but it was her choice) The case was delicious and it was beautiful. Next were the cookies that they made the girls got a kick out of those. Since the whole thing was "No Boys Allowed" her daddy made two signs for the hotel room that welcomed all that came by. The take home goodies? A robe with their names,flip flops, drinking glasses,hand towels (with princesses on them) homemade soap and night masks oh and some lotions. The lotions were going to be homemade to be honest I ran out of time and energy. I refuse to go into price on this one but I'll say that it was way more when all was said and done. The girls arrived to music. Got to test their robes then it was time to begin. It was facials, pedicures,and tattoos. Thanks to the awesomeness of her BFF's mom (we will call her "Photo-Mom" as I have not gotten permission to let her name out.) She assisted in everything. She was greatness and really made me realize that even though I had the general idea planned and of course the sweets I was sooo not ready for the next phase. Entertaining these sweet girls. She helped with getting them

to dance and played some egg hunting games. We took random pictures then to the park to play and some icecream before coming back and settling in for the Princess Bride and bed time. Once again my sweet little girl told me I was the best mommy ever. Through all of my fretting and of course money spending my little girl had a great time. The girls wake up for breakfast and more fun while they get to watch Frozen. Now as I tell you this I forget to mention that I am so tired. My body is sore and I have made a startling discovery I am not as young as I used to be and sadly I don't think I will be moving in the very near future. Oh and not only did Mini have her big day but one of her besties one of the girls at the party, (yea) is also having a party and it was done on the very next day. So it was off to home for some napping then it was Roo's turn to be the awesome parent. As I literally feel like my legs are going to fall off Roo said he would take one and go to the next party. So there was man taking one for the team. lol, I know it sounds funny but I haven't even told why I say he took the bullet as far as dads are concerned. That's right folks. My man attended an all girl party to the glamours and fabulous  SWWET & SASSY.  Now that she has had all this fun Mini is home not feeling well.. My sweet little Mini had a little to much sugar and of course the weather changing so she is home not feeling to well. Oh well I would say that it was pretty much worth it in her eyes. So until next year's great birthday debate.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MINI

YOU ARE THE STARS

IN MY SKY

Its March already?

Have you ever realized how quick life can pass by? Better yet have you looked up and realized you may have missed something? Yea me either lol. Hello to all my faithful readers I am sorry I have not written in a while. Once again I have been plagued with writers block well and sickness.  Sophia's birthday passed by this year and though it was still a time of sadness it was not a heartbreaking as last year. Now that's not to say it's easier but the pain was more manageable. Roo would not let me stay in bed or in the house this year. The idea was that we spend it as a family and we enjoy it so that is just what we did. We took Mini bowling for her sisters birthday this year. It was important for her and all of us to celebrate this day. I am told that every year will be different and that little by little it will get easier. I'm not so much for the easy part but I can see where I can breath more fully. 

So Mini has a best friend. I'm really excited she got to have her first sleep over a few weeks ago. I can't say enough good things about the BestFriend. She is sweet and well mannered. Her parents are awesome as well and for me that is a big plus as I tend to be very picky about parents. It's not that I don't want Mini to have friends its just that I want her friends parents to be like me, almost. I want them to know that I don't feel like its the end of the world if she gets a scrape. If the girls wanna go play in dirt, well then they just need to be hosed down. Kids are kids and now a days I feel like they have lost that part. I feel like some people are encouraging their children to grow up to fast and with Mini I just want her to be the child that she needs to be. I want to encourage her to increase her knowledge and I want to educate her on any subject she is will to learn but at the same time I want her to know that it's ok to be silly and to play dress up and barbies. I want her to know that she doesn't have to be in a rush to grow up and that its good to be a kid. So after her spring break I am hoping that she will get to spend more time making plans with her friends. 

So the other thing in life is in the Land of Cubes. As you know I work in the Magical Land of Cubes where everyone is with in a face slap distance away. And for some strange reason everyone feels the need to continuously come into work sick. With this being said I have been sick quite a bit here lately. And it has really sucked. But after blood work and a doctor visit they discovered that I have been dehydrated since I was typically am unable to fully rest I continued to push forward and keep moving which of course resulted in my having to have fluids by I.V. that of course was today. Though my arm was still cold for quite awhile I can say that I feel better then I had been feeling for awhile now. I can also say that I still hate having a needle placed in my arm. But hopefully this will help me get over this stupid cold. The other thing I would like to look into is photography I would like to try my hand, Now all I have to do is convince Roo that I really want to do it. I'll keep you posted on how that one goes. I just want to start doing something fun. 

There is still so much to say and to catch up on but as I am growing sleepy I am thinking that right now may not be the best time to go into everything. So I shall say goodnight and thanks for being a part of my family