Being Scammed For the Holidays

It's funny after all the posts and the glimpses into my life I've given you this seems to be the hardest one. My family and I have been through quite a bit. Roo and I have made choices that most may or may not understand. Everything we have done has been to try and better not only ourselves but to provide a better life for Mini. The death of one child makes you, as a parent, cherish the life of another but with that comes the hard aches of not feeling good enough. 
People do not know all of the actual struggles that we have endured because I have become extremely good about putting on a happy face. I have been careful to not reveal much due to the fact that somethings are just not talked about and yet I have a disclaimer. ---------->
Well folks like I said this is the hardest post because I have to admit that even I can be wrong. Even I can be too trusting and fall for something. The holiday season is upon on us and there are so many changes that my family must face yet again. This is the second holiday that our little Sophia will miss out, this is the first holiday that my grandfather will not be apart of us. Roo and I are struggling with bills due to repairs and things that break down. We are in fact very normal in our life. So here is what has happened....
We have been victims to a theft. Again this is not an easy story to tell so please bare with me as we are definitely not proud or excited about what has happened. We applied for a loan to help out during the holidays and to assist with a few of the major bills that due to home repairs we acquired more then the normal billing. We applied with GE Capital Bank. Roo was contacted and told he was approved, we believed that after several years of nothing but bad luck and sorrow that we were finally getting a break and that our prayers were answered. Boy were we wrong. The gentleman that contacted him first was named Derek. He stated that Roo had been approved for a substantial amount and that we would be able to make small monthly payments over the next few months. A loan like this would help improve his credit, Roo told him he would need to speak with me, yes we are one of those strange couples who talk about everything, and he then got back to him and agreed. 
Again we believed at the time we were speaking with GE Capital. This week on our vacation and on the time of Thanksgiving holiday we learned a very valuable lesson, even smart people will fall for a something when they believe they have no other choice. Roo contacted the number provided and a new gentleman George told him that Derek was out. George then told him that he would assist Roo with the transaction, after speaking to him for a bit George then told him their system would not allow them to verify anything with our account. He instructed Roo to place money on a MoneyPak so that they could see the money was holding and available. After following directions, again hold all your yelling at the stupidity until the end, Roo contacted GE back. This time he spoke to a Michael that stated that he could see the funds and that loan would be transferred in to our acct with in 45 min at the latest. Hours went by and no money, we contacted the bank and no transfer has taken place. We contacted GE and they assured him that everything was fine and that it had gone through.
As Roo and I began to discuss things some things started to push forward in our minds. I began to do some research, which if I had been thinking before I would have done and we would have been in better shape. I learned that GE Capital Bank is fully aware of this scam, they are so aware that they have a disclaimer on their website that reads:

Important!
Urgent Advisory: DO NOT provide your Walmart MoneyCard or MoneyPak information to callers. GE Money Bank is now GE Capital Retail Bank. We do not offer personal loans to be loaded on Walmart MoneyCard or MoneyPak and would never ask you to load money on a card product in order to qualify for a loan. If someone has called you stating they are from GE Money Bank or GE Capital Retail Bank and asked you to load money on a MoneyPak or Walmart MoneyCard in order to obtain a loan, DO NOT provide them with your information and please contact your local authorities. If you believe you have been a victim, in addition to contacting local authorities, you may visit www.ftc.gov for more information.


After I found this on the GE website I literally felt my heart drop. Nobody ever wants to admit that the gift or miracle they thought that they were receiving wasn't a gift or miracle after all. So Roo called back. We first checked the cards and sure enough the money they held was gone So when he called back he was told that Michael was in a meeting and would call him back shortly. Shortly ended over an hour later. I called back and the didn't give any information but that I had received a call from this number, the gentleman stated that he was Michael and proceeded to tell me, as another person, that the refund that I requested would not arrive for 20-30 days. When I explained who I was he then tried to blame us for the funds not being there and then started to tell me how if we just continue to wait they would be available along with the funds from the MoneyPak. We went over several items the main thing being that I now knew this for a scam, which he never did deny but he continued to stated the funds would be there.
We contacted the police and an very nice officer came out and took my statement. By this time we both understood what had happened. We were feeling so blessed that something was finally going right for us that we didn't question the things that we would normally question. Like the fact that never once did they state we were on a recorded line. Never once did they state he would need to sign a contract. We were just blind. Roo contacted MoneyPak so that he could see if we could learn where the money was unloaded. Because they have it on the card that they are not responsible for theft, they are of course willing to work with law enforcement since they stated that anyone who was using them to commit fraud they would like to prosecute. The officer basically said that even though we were able to provide a phone number the likeliness of catching this person is none and we would never get our money back.
And once again I cried, not necessarily for the money, I mean this guy taught us a very valuable lesson, I cried because for years we have worked hard. We have struggled, but we have worked hard to provide something good for our daughter, we have been faced with one small tragedy after another and we have kept our heads up. We have used everything thing that we have faced as a new challenge to better ourselves. We have more then stood by the whole for Poorer thing in our wedding vows. We have grown together and suffered through our bad choices from earlier in our marriage and yet this one thing was able to break us down. It was able to make us feel that we will never be able to catch even the smallest break. That even though we will continue and smile and show our daughter that she is our greatest joy, this year our holiday season may just fall flat. We have always managed to pull a rabbit out of a hat for her but with everything from the past year and this year and now with this perfect shining example of how dumb a person can be well I'm trying my damnedest to find that rabbit.
This is the first year that she may fully come to realize that not everything is as jolly as we have made it out to be and that is not something I ever wanted her to know. But this person, this thief took that from us. Though he did not physically rob our home, he still managed to steal from us. He still managed to make us feel broken and I hope that he really needed that money. I hope that he will enjoy what he has taken from others because as the officer pointed out several times there will be no getting it back.
Thank you for listening, I hope that after hearing this horrible and embarrassing story you will pass it along to your friends and family, make sure that what happened to us doesn't happen to you or them. The only way to stop a thief is to make people aware and though I hate to admit I was a victim I am choosing to lay it out there in hope that I can save someone from the same sadness and violation that I feel.
Later Days

Story of Love and Life

Happy Sunday to all my faithful readers. I have been hearing and reading a lot about a blogger who sweetly and elegantly put "Marriage is Not for Me". Though his views are wise and have hopefully saved his marriage from the fate of divorce, it has cause a lot of thoughts to go through my head. Marriage is not a "Me" issue it is a "We" thing but at the same time you have to ask yourself what do you bring to the relationship. In some aspects a marriage can be seen like a business deal as both parties need to have something to offer. No I don't necessarily mean financial stability, though that could be a plus in the long run. I am talking friendship and love. Though we all want to believe in the everlasting love that is depicted in the movies or even wrote about in the book, most of us realize that kind of love takes work and it helps if you are able to go down this journey with your friend. 

I'm not saying that, that heart pounding, take your breath away, causes tears of joy kind of love does not exist or that it can not exist in an instant. What I am saying is that, that kind of love can fade and it takes work to be able to keep that feeling alive in some marriages. Sometimes once we are married we lose ourselves to the marriage and we think that because we have won the heart of our partner that we have the right to relax and not continue to try to keep those moments alive. So today's blog is about the journey of love and life of two people. We had a quick beginning and we are still together though some never thought it was possible. Many people are aware of how I met my husband, but for those of you that are new to my world I'll break it down really quickly for you. I'm not really a private person in some areas of my life and since we both tend to get a kick out of this story I will gladly share it for a back ground. 

I met Andrew (Roo) on February 17,2001 at work. I had been working for Wal-Mart for a while by this time and I was a senior in high school. It was his first day of work and if you have ever worked for a store like Wal-Mart you may know that you are taken on a tour of the store. I at the fitting room (which I would hang out quite frequently) with a friend of mine when we saw one of the older trainers with two guys. One was an extremely tall, lanky guy who could be classified as cute in a boyish kind of way. The other one was tall, brown hair blue eyes and had piercings he was wearing a white psych ward shirt (a shirt that I would later wear until I had to get rid of it) It was just something about the look of him that caught my attention I told my friend that I would marry that one. Of course she laughed but we went on about our way. I actually introduced myself to him inquiring if he needed help finding his size in the bra's that they were being shown by the trainer, he held one up and said "Nah I don't think you have my size" I smiled sweetly and replied "You can try the little girls section I'm sure they've got something for you" and needless to say we've been together ever since.

  From the moment that we met we became friends first. Roo was very adement about being my friend first since I knew that I was "talking" to someone else at the time. The more time we spent together the more that I realized that this really was the one that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He held my heart as my friend. I am a person who at times is very guarded and he made sure that no matter what the issue he would scale any of the walls I put up between us. Though he would repeatedly tell me that he was not going to "chase" after me he did a pretty good job of  handling any of the crazy that was handed him.  Soon I decided it was time for the ulitmate test and I invited him along to meet the family. He was only told about meeting my parents but he met my brother and grandparents that way and I was able to show him my familyself (theres the self that we show others and the self that we are around family) My family liked him and I knew there was something special even when my mom called him by the wrong name he laughed it off  and saw the humor in it.  We still joke about that to this day. When he proposed he knew I would say yes so his proposal was not the most romatnic in the since that I cried happy tears. I cried, oh yes I cried but it was from tears of laugher. I mean being asked "So you think you want to?" is not really the way most girls want to be asked to marry them but for us it was perfect. We are very different then most, he recognized early on that though I am every bit a girl there was still something things that was even too girly for me and we compromised. We used this time of our engagement to grow with eachother. I had just turned 19 and we decided (with the accpetance of family) that we would begin our life. One the day of our wedding, we were both asked if we were sure. I mean lets face it one night as we were getting ready we had that magical discussion. You know the one where you talk about your fears?

How do we know that we will work out? What happens if we don't? What if we have kids?

So we discussed everything calmly and here is what we came up with at that time.

Tomorrow isn't promised, we need to live for today and learn from yesterday. We are only human and are not perfect but as long as we stay honest with each other then we can work through anything. Children are brought into this world with love so even if we did not work as a couple we would make sure that any child we may have would understand that they were still loved and that we would still find away to be friends and a family even if a different kind. If we don't work out then that is in the hands of GOD but we will work on anything we need to. Lastly the ultimate question came up. Do you believe in divorce? 

This is not a matter of religion but my answer to him was "You better be sure about me, I do not believe in divorce, I do believe in murder and I believe that I have acreage and a shovel and some really good alibis...So you need to be really sure before you get into this forever cause that whole death do us part thing is not really a suggestion as more of a fact even after death the whole we're gonna be apart is highly questionable." (yes i did say all this with a straight face) he thought for a moment and then nodded and said "Eternity to have you with me? Sounds good to me" and once again he won my heart.

The love part of our lives has always been the easy part. We are different in many ways and yet once people get to talk to us both they realize that we are the same...I just look like the sweet one. Our life together had been a little more up and down. He is still my best friend and I am thankful that I am walking this life with him. We have different views on some issue when it comes to how handle some situations. We have been through the death of several family members. We've been through the loss of a child and though I think I've went crazy sometimes, it helps to know that he will understand me...
Marriage is about me sometimes and its about him. Because we came together knowing what we could offer. He couldn't offer me riches but he offered his heart and his understanding and acceptance. He offered his strength when I was unable to have strength of my own. He makes it about me in the little things that he does to show that though I may have been a princess to my dad, I am a queen to him...(Lame to some but perfect to me) At the same time I came into this marriage offering myself, my love and my understanding and acceptance. I try to offer my sense of humor and optimism when there may not be any. I offered to help build a home and gave him two beautiful little girls even though only one could stay with us.
Marriage is a work in progress and nothing is ever perfect and over the years you will take each other for granted. You will fight, you will make up. For the gentleman who again so proudly stated "Marriage is not for me" you have realized early on into your marriage something that many do not. It's going to take work from both. We want it to be easy, we want it to be just like the movies "They met, they fell in love, they lived happily ever after" well in order to get to the Happily Ever After you need to go through the ups and downs, you need to be willing to grow with your partner. I can honestly say that I feel somedays that I've grown up with Roo, then again sometimes I think we still think we are kids in away. But the important part is that when we feel that we are going in different directions we are able to talk and are willing to reintroduce ourselves to each other.
There is a song by Paramore that I love Still Into You. the chorus of the song is what really sums it up for me and I'll leave you with that thought

I should be over all the butterflies
I'm into you
And baby even on our worst nights
I'm into you
Let them wonder how we got this far
Cause I don't even need to wonder at all
Yea after all this time
I"m still into you.

Thanksgiving History-My Thankful

 Hey there to all my faithful readers. As you may can tell Halloween Season is over and since I refuse to begin celebrating Christmas before it's time that means I'm gearing up for Thanksgiving. Also since it's the first of November that means its time to start breaking out all the turkey and dressing recipes along with the cakes, puddings and pies. It's time to start telling the world what we are thankful for even if they have absolutely no interest at all. And mostly its time to begin spending more quality time with family and friends. This year for my family is another year that we must accept that our worlds are going to be changed once again and we will all have to learn how best to deal with those changes. So lets get started with the History of Thanksgiving.

 During the Civil War in 1863 President Lincoln proclaimed "Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent,Father who dwelleth in the Heavens" to be celebrated on a national level on Thursday, November 26, Now I don't want to cause some religious debate like we have at Christmas but I would like to point out that "Father who dwelleth in the Heavens," was not Lincolns kinfolk who had passed away, he was talking about God. We celebrate and are thankful for so many things that sometimes we forget when this actually began. See in 1621 The Pilgrims, you know the really old dudes that came from abroad on those big things called boats? Yea them. Anyway they put their prejudices and dislikes aside and celebrated their success of their first harvest in the New World. 53 Pilgrims and 90 American Indians attended a three day feast. Now I know that this is not truly the first Thanksgiving as for years different cultures would celebrate with days of prayer and giving thanks to the heavens for being alive, making through a war, the end of a drought ect. But I just wanted to touch base there with a little History.
So with that being said lets get to the other portion, what I am thankful for. I am sure that people are thankful every day for something or other. But I never understood why they only want to voice that thankfulness in November instead of everyday.

I have so many things that I wish or hope for but I am also thankful for the many blessings in my life right now. I am thankful for my family. Good, bad, pretty, ugly we are there for each other. Last year was a hard year as we had just lost our little Sophia. It's so strange to think that a year has gone by and that we are still here with out her in our arms. I wonder sometimes what she would be doing at this stage in her life. I wonder what her and Mini would be playing with. And though I don't say it I miss her everyday. And though this is not the first Thanksgiving we are without her I still find it hard. But I am thankful for the even the few hours that I got to be with her. I am thankful for the light she brought this family and how she touched so many people with only hours of her being here.

I know that she is in better place and I know that everyday we get stronger. Even a year later.So I am thankful for my sweet angel in heaven. I am thankful for her big sister, Mini. Mini has shown strength and grace this past year. She is always full of light even when you know she's still not real sure what to do with herself. She has handled some situations better then some of us adults. And I couldn't be more proud of her. I am blessed that Mini was given to us. I still wish we were able to expand our family so that she can share the greatness that is her with others and we are still working on this but first we have to get through some of the not so great stuff. One of my favorite pics of Mini, she was about four and I know that she has grown so much but I still look at this picture and see her as she is today.
Her heart is so big. I am so thankful she is mine, even when she throws her girlatude at me, lol. I am thankful for my parents, who continue to teach me new things even at my age. I am thankful that not matter what they are on my side. I am thankful for my in-laws, I know its crazy right? I am thankful for my older brother and his beautiful wife. I am thankful for my cousins and aunts Though you will never read a lot about them. I am thankful for both of my grandmothers. These two strong women helped pave the way for their strong children who, I am told I get my strength and stubbornness from. This year I am a little extra thankful for my Poppy. As you may know he passed away in August and it has been another struggle for us. He was a great man and this is a different kind of year as we begin the Holiday season with out him. I am thankful for the stories he shared with me that I can pass on to my daughter. I am thankful for the life lessons he taught us all and for him just being him no matter what. I know he is with my Sophie and I know they are watching over us all.
I am thankful for some many things that I know I've only scratched the surface and I'm sure I'll be letting you know of those soon but I think for now I'm going to just say that you should be thankful everyday for everything you have. You should be able to open you mind enough to be there for others and be mindful of their feelings. So lets think about that...
Later Days